Master Cleanse: A Retrospective

Today is Tuesday, November 11. I have been off of the cleanse for six days now. Here's how the past few days have gone:

Nov. 6 and 7
No more lemonade. I did do a saltwater flush the morning of the 6th as a last hoorah. I consumed only water and fresh-squeezed fruit and vegetable juices.

Nov. 8
I had a bowl of cream of spinach soup and one of vegetable broth. It didn't take much for me to be full. It felt good to taste something new.

Nov. 9
I had some baguette and goat cheese along with a thick lentil soup. No problems at all with the solid food.

Nov. 10
My first real meal was sashimi at the sushi restaurant around the block. I'd been looking forward to the meal ever since I started the cleanse. It did not disappoint. I still had a rather small appetite, but it was so good. I also drank two beers (how often can I get Sapporo on draft?) and it took me forever to consume them.


All in all, I'm glad to have done the cleanse. I didn't experience a dramatic increase in energy, but I definitely didn't experience a loss. I never once felt weak or hungry in my 10 days of the cleanse. I did start to feel that way on the 6th-9th, the days I was off of the lemonade but not yet solid food. Maybe there's something to the mixture of water, lemon juice, maple syrup, and cayenne pepper. I ended up losing a total of 11 pounds and have been able to maintain a steady weight since I reintroduced food into my diet. I've been able to run with no more acid reflux incidents.

As crazy as it sounds, I'll probably continue to do the saltwater at least once a week. I did it the morning of the 10th. While it did get me going, it did not have the urgency of when I was on the cleanse. It was needed though. That has been the only time I've pooped since I stopped the cleanse. I guess that my body is holding onto the food for as long as it can. I'm sure that will change in time.

I'm also going to try and do the cleanse at least once a year. I'd like to try to do it even longer, maybe for a month. I really think that I could do it. I'm sure that Helen would kill me though. Maybe I can send her on a trip for a while. She thinks that I've developed an eating disorder. I've learned to eat when I'm hungry, and not when I'm craving something. I'm not denying my body anything, I'm just getting used to a new routine.

I'd like to thank those of you who have read these ramblings about crap. I'm more than happy to answer any questions regarding the Master Cleanse. If anyone would like to borrow the book, I'd be happy to loan it to you. The meat of the book takes about an hour to read.

In closing, I leave you this quote by Antonin Artoud: "Where there is a stink of shit there is a smell of being." Well, my friends, there was definitely some being in my bathroom and bowels.