Today is Tuesday, November 11. I have been off of the cleanse for six days now. Here's how the past few days have gone:
Nov. 6 and 7
No more lemonade. I did do a saltwater flush the morning of the 6th as a last hoorah. I consumed only water and fresh-squeezed fruit and vegetable juices.
Nov. 8
I had a bowl of cream of spinach soup and one of vegetable broth. It didn't take much for me to be full. It felt good to taste something new.
Nov. 9
I had some baguette and goat cheese along with a thick lentil soup. No problems at all with the solid food.
Nov. 10
My first real meal was sashimi at the sushi restaurant around the block. I'd been looking forward to the meal ever since I started the cleanse. It did not disappoint. I still had a rather small appetite, but it was so good. I also drank two beers (how often can I get Sapporo on draft?) and it took me forever to consume them.
All in all, I'm glad to have done the cleanse. I didn't experience a dramatic increase in energy, but I definitely didn't experience a loss. I never once felt weak or hungry in my 10 days of the cleanse. I did start to feel that way on the 6th-9th, the days I was off of the lemonade but not yet solid food. Maybe there's something to the mixture of water, lemon juice, maple syrup, and cayenne pepper. I ended up losing a total of 11 pounds and have been able to maintain a steady weight since I reintroduced food into my diet. I've been able to run with no more acid reflux incidents.
As crazy as it sounds, I'll probably continue to do the saltwater at least once a week. I did it the morning of the 10th. While it did get me going, it did not have the urgency of when I was on the cleanse. It was needed though. That has been the only time I've pooped since I stopped the cleanse. I guess that my body is holding onto the food for as long as it can. I'm sure that will change in time.
I'm also going to try and do the cleanse at least once a year. I'd like to try to do it even longer, maybe for a month. I really think that I could do it. I'm sure that Helen would kill me though. Maybe I can send her on a trip for a while. She thinks that I've developed an eating disorder. I've learned to eat when I'm hungry, and not when I'm craving something. I'm not denying my body anything, I'm just getting used to a new routine.
I'd like to thank those of you who have read these ramblings about crap. I'm more than happy to answer any questions regarding the Master Cleanse. If anyone would like to borrow the book, I'd be happy to loan it to you. The meat of the book takes about an hour to read.
In closing, I leave you this quote by Antonin Artoud: "Where there is a stink of shit there is a smell of being." Well, my friends, there was definitely some being in my bathroom and bowels.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Thursday, November 6, 2008
Day 10, 11/05/08
Glasses of "lemonade" consumed: 7
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 5 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 17 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 3
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: 0, but I'm convinced there's something in there
Weight lost since previous day: 0.4 lbs
Total weight lost: 9.0 lbs
It's over. Well, the actual cleanse, that is. I've got a few days before I still get back into solid food and then a few more until I'll start eating "regular" meals again. However, the lemonade during the day, saltwater in the morning, and senna laxative tea are no longer in the picture. I could not be happier. I will enjoy no longer waking up at 3:00 AM each day to stomach cramps and a trip to the bathroom.
I will continue to post over the next few days until I'm back to a normal eating routine. At the end of everything I'll sum up my experience with the Master Cleanse.
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 5 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 17 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 3
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: 0, but I'm convinced there's something in there
Weight lost since previous day: 0.4 lbs
Total weight lost: 9.0 lbs
It's over. Well, the actual cleanse, that is. I've got a few days before I still get back into solid food and then a few more until I'll start eating "regular" meals again. However, the lemonade during the day, saltwater in the morning, and senna laxative tea are no longer in the picture. I could not be happier. I will enjoy no longer waking up at 3:00 AM each day to stomach cramps and a trip to the bathroom.
I will continue to post over the next few days until I'm back to a normal eating routine. At the end of everything I'll sum up my experience with the Master Cleanse.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
Day 9, 11/04/08
Glasses of "lemonade" consumed: 7
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 9 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 8 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 4
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: :(
Weight lost since previous day: 0.8 lbs
Total weight lost: 8.6 lbs
I was quite surprised to find that my morning movement produced something that resembled solid waste. Because I haven't seen solid crap in some time, I'll just go ahead and call it solid. This doesn't mean that it was your normal solid movement, but at this point anything solid is an amazing feat.
Still no hunger, which is good. It's hard to believe that this is almost over.
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 9 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 8 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 4
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: :(
Weight lost since previous day: 0.8 lbs
Total weight lost: 8.6 lbs
I was quite surprised to find that my morning movement produced something that resembled solid waste. Because I haven't seen solid crap in some time, I'll just go ahead and call it solid. This doesn't mean that it was your normal solid movement, but at this point anything solid is an amazing feat.
Still no hunger, which is good. It's hard to believe that this is almost over.
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Day 8, 11/03/04
Glasses of "lemonade" consumed: 7
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 8 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 8 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 6
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: :(
Weight lost since previous day: 1.6 lbs
Total weight lost: 7.8 lbs
Another relatively easy day. Hunger was really never present. The weight loss is back. I don't know if it's because I've cut my lemonade consumption by one serving or because I started doing some exercises a few days ago. Probably the latter is helping me burn extra calories and speeding up the process.
Got to wake up early again to a slightly cramped stomach but at least there were some solids there. I wonder how long of a cleanse it would take in order for there to be no more crap coming out. The guy who wrote the book said he did one for 45 days. Hey, I'm 18% of the way to the length of his cleanse, so I should just keep going. It'll be nothing. I'd probably lose a girlfriend though.
Only 2 days left.
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 8 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 8 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 6
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: :(
Weight lost since previous day: 1.6 lbs
Total weight lost: 7.8 lbs
Another relatively easy day. Hunger was really never present. The weight loss is back. I don't know if it's because I've cut my lemonade consumption by one serving or because I started doing some exercises a few days ago. Probably the latter is helping me burn extra calories and speeding up the process.
Got to wake up early again to a slightly cramped stomach but at least there were some solids there. I wonder how long of a cleanse it would take in order for there to be no more crap coming out. The guy who wrote the book said he did one for 45 days. Hey, I'm 18% of the way to the length of his cleanse, so I should just keep going. It'll be nothing. I'd probably lose a girlfriend though.
Only 2 days left.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
Day 7, 11/02/08
Glasses of "lemonade" consumed: 7
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 7 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 30 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 5
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: :(
Weight lost since previous day: 0.0
Total weight lost: 6.2 lbs.
Another average day. I got to wake up in the middle of the night to the senna tea telling me it was time to go and it was right. I'm guessing that's why the saltwater took a little longer to kick in.
The weight loss definitely seems to have slowed. I'll have to see how the last few days go. I might drink a serving of lemonade less if I'm not hungry to see if that helps.
Only 3 more days left, so I guess I'm on the homestretch. However, real meals probably won't start until next Monday. Before then it will be fresh juice, vegetable and chicken broth, and raw fruits and vegetables. I'm still planning my first meal back on the food wagon.
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 7 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 30 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 5
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: :(
Weight lost since previous day: 0.0
Total weight lost: 6.2 lbs.
Another average day. I got to wake up in the middle of the night to the senna tea telling me it was time to go and it was right. I'm guessing that's why the saltwater took a little longer to kick in.
The weight loss definitely seems to have slowed. I'll have to see how the last few days go. I might drink a serving of lemonade less if I'm not hungry to see if that helps.
Only 3 more days left, so I guess I'm on the homestretch. However, real meals probably won't start until next Monday. Before then it will be fresh juice, vegetable and chicken broth, and raw fruits and vegetables. I'm still planning my first meal back on the food wagon.
Day 6, 11/01/08
Glasses of "lemonade" consumed: 8
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 2 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 3 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 3
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: :(
Weight lost since previous day: 0.2
Total weight lost: 6.2 lbs.
The senna tea is really doing its job now. I have to go to the bathroom as soon as I wake up. However, it wasn't the explosion that I had been expecting/hoping for. Have no fear though, the saltwater flush still hits me too.
My first bathroom visit of the day is starting to have more sustenance to it. It's nothing major, but you I can definitely tell that waste is being removed from my linings. There's still hope that I'll find that random toy car that I never knew I ingested, which is what I'm hoping for.
I'm noticing the smell of food more, but I'm not hungry. I'm also craving a taste other than my lemonade, tea, and saltwater. Maybe I'm starting to see food more as a luxury than a necessity. That's not to say that I'm not going to eat when the cleanse is done, but maybe now I'll appreciate tastes more and take my time as opposed to just eating it and having taste as an afterthought.
My weight loss seems to be plateauing a bit. With four more days to go I'd like to lose at least two more pounds. The more I lose now, the more room I'll have to plateau at my ideal weight once I start eating again.
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 2 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 3 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 3
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: :(
Weight lost since previous day: 0.2
Total weight lost: 6.2 lbs.
The senna tea is really doing its job now. I have to go to the bathroom as soon as I wake up. However, it wasn't the explosion that I had been expecting/hoping for. Have no fear though, the saltwater flush still hits me too.
My first bathroom visit of the day is starting to have more sustenance to it. It's nothing major, but you I can definitely tell that waste is being removed from my linings. There's still hope that I'll find that random toy car that I never knew I ingested, which is what I'm hoping for.
I'm noticing the smell of food more, but I'm not hungry. I'm also craving a taste other than my lemonade, tea, and saltwater. Maybe I'm starting to see food more as a luxury than a necessity. That's not to say that I'm not going to eat when the cleanse is done, but maybe now I'll appreciate tastes more and take my time as opposed to just eating it and having taste as an afterthought.
My weight loss seems to be plateauing a bit. With four more days to go I'd like to lose at least two more pounds. The more I lose now, the more room I'll have to plateau at my ideal weight once I start eating again.
Friday, October 31, 2008
Day 5, 10/31/08
Glasses of "lemonade" consumed: 8
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 5 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 20 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 5
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: nothing, and I'm getting frustrated
Weight lost since previous day: 0.6
Total weight lost: 6.0 lbs.
Today was a new experience for me. I was awoken early this morning by some stomach cramps. I decided not to tempt falling back asleep and crapping in the bed, only to wake up in it 30 minutes later. It looks like the senna tea finally kicked in. I couldn't even mix my salt water before I was in the bathroom. The senna tea is known to cause cramping, so I like to imagine that there's a bowel battle going on inside of me. There was even a little bit of solid (and by that I mean semi-solid) material. Progress.
I felt a little tired today and felt like my stomach was empty for the first time so far. I also developed a gassy feeling later in the day. There's no pootin' going on, only the feeling of air bubbles moving around inside. I'm expecting it to get backed up and provide me with quite a show in the morning. Our toilet doesn't have handles, but I might wish that it did tomorrow. There's no drain installed in our bathroom floor so any explosions cannot be solved with some Dawn and a hose.
5 days down and 5 to go. If I can get through the weekend I think I'll be okay. Happy Halloween.
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 5 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 20 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 5
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: nothing, and I'm getting frustrated
Weight lost since previous day: 0.6
Total weight lost: 6.0 lbs.
Today was a new experience for me. I was awoken early this morning by some stomach cramps. I decided not to tempt falling back asleep and crapping in the bed, only to wake up in it 30 minutes later. It looks like the senna tea finally kicked in. I couldn't even mix my salt water before I was in the bathroom. The senna tea is known to cause cramping, so I like to imagine that there's a bowel battle going on inside of me. There was even a little bit of solid (and by that I mean semi-solid) material. Progress.
I felt a little tired today and felt like my stomach was empty for the first time so far. I also developed a gassy feeling later in the day. There's no pootin' going on, only the feeling of air bubbles moving around inside. I'm expecting it to get backed up and provide me with quite a show in the morning. Our toilet doesn't have handles, but I might wish that it did tomorrow. There's no drain installed in our bathroom floor so any explosions cannot be solved with some Dawn and a hose.
5 days down and 5 to go. If I can get through the weekend I think I'll be okay. Happy Halloween.
Day 4, 10/30/08
Glasses of "lemonade" consumed: 9
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 3 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 6 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 5
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: still nothing
Weight lost since previous day: 0.4
Total weight lost: 5.4 lbs.
Nothing too exciting today. I had a few cravings for food but no real thoughts of eating it because I'm just not hungry. Maybe the most important thing I'll take away from this is how to eat normal portions. I'm not usually a 3 meals a day type of person because I can't eat that much food. However, when I do eat I tend to eat more than comfortably fits in my stomach. I'll continue to eat once my hunger is satiated because I enjoy the taste of food so much. I also eat so quickly much of the time that my stomach is full before my brain knows it, thus the over consumption.
We'll see if I can make it through Halloween without an Almond Joy sneaking its way into my mouth.
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 3 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 6 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 5
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: still nothing
Weight lost since previous day: 0.4
Total weight lost: 5.4 lbs.
Nothing too exciting today. I had a few cravings for food but no real thoughts of eating it because I'm just not hungry. Maybe the most important thing I'll take away from this is how to eat normal portions. I'm not usually a 3 meals a day type of person because I can't eat that much food. However, when I do eat I tend to eat more than comfortably fits in my stomach. I'll continue to eat once my hunger is satiated because I enjoy the taste of food so much. I also eat so quickly much of the time that my stomach is full before my brain knows it, thus the over consumption.
We'll see if I can make it through Halloween without an Almond Joy sneaking its way into my mouth.
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Day 3, 10/29/08
Glasses of "lemonade" consumed: 9
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 3 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 3 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 3
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: still nothing
Weight lost since previous day: 1.4
Total weight lost: 5 lbs.
Relatively easy day. I'm becoming a pro at chugging saltwater. I won't be able to turn pro until I stop gagging though. 3 minutes is a good time though, both going in and going out.
There was a little more "substance" in the movements today. More than yesterday, but that's not saying much. There were testimonials in the book where people said they'd gone a few days with nothing and then stuff magically appeared. I guess that some crap is better at hiding than others. That, or it takes a while to start breaking down all of the stuff that's built up inside your intestines.
I was craving food a little tonight but that probably had something to do with the fact that Helen was watching Top Chef on the food network. A piece of steak was sounding really good then.
I'm considering adding a new stat to the list, number of times that I pee. Man, I have to average at least once an hour that I'm awake at a minimum. Sometimes I'm even waking up in the night to go, which I never do. And these aren't "oh, I should probably go pee" pees. These are "I gotta go right now" pees. So far I haven't wet my pants, but with 7 days left anything is possible.
I should also clarify one thing about the timing of my "toxin eliminations"; almost all of them occur within the first hour or two of me being awake. The first one occurs pretty soon after I finish the saltwater flush and the second one occurs shortly after that. I sit around all afternoon and evening with no pooping to do. So sad.
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 3 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 3 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 3
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: still nothing
Weight lost since previous day: 1.4
Total weight lost: 5 lbs.
Relatively easy day. I'm becoming a pro at chugging saltwater. I won't be able to turn pro until I stop gagging though. 3 minutes is a good time though, both going in and going out.
There was a little more "substance" in the movements today. More than yesterday, but that's not saying much. There were testimonials in the book where people said they'd gone a few days with nothing and then stuff magically appeared. I guess that some crap is better at hiding than others. That, or it takes a while to start breaking down all of the stuff that's built up inside your intestines.
I was craving food a little tonight but that probably had something to do with the fact that Helen was watching Top Chef on the food network. A piece of steak was sounding really good then.
I'm considering adding a new stat to the list, number of times that I pee. Man, I have to average at least once an hour that I'm awake at a minimum. Sometimes I'm even waking up in the night to go, which I never do. And these aren't "oh, I should probably go pee" pees. These are "I gotta go right now" pees. So far I haven't wet my pants, but with 7 days left anything is possible.
I should also clarify one thing about the timing of my "toxin eliminations"; almost all of them occur within the first hour or two of me being awake. The first one occurs pretty soon after I finish the saltwater flush and the second one occurs shortly after that. I sit around all afternoon and evening with no pooping to do. So sad.
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Day 2, 10/28/08
Glasses of "lemonade" consumed: 9
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 7 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 5 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 5
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: 0, but still hoping
Pounds lost from previous day: 2.4
Today was a pretty easy day. The saltwater was not as bad this morning, as evidenced by cutting my consumption time down by more than half. That doesn't mean that it's good though. My quick consumption also led to some quick excretion. I was ready to go before I even finished my salt water. Tempting fate by trying to control your bowels whilst drinking saltwater is something that I should probably never try again. Helen cleans up enough crap at work, so I highly doubt she'd be up for me waking her up to clean up me and my explosion on the floor. Knowing my luck, Butters would be dumb enough to come roll in it.
I started drinking my lemonade 2 doses at a time. I assume that this is legit because it's more about how many ounces you drink per day and not the individual servings, if that makes sense. You're supposed to average about 1 ounce of lemonade per 2 pounds of body weight. It is recommended to space them out so that you don't get hungry throughout the day. The multiple dose game plan accomplishes two things. First, it allows me to not feel full of liquid all day long. I can knock out two doses and give my stomach and bladder time to pass it. And pass it they do. Second, I don't have to spend as much time juicing lemons. When you have cats that like to scratch and bite, lemon juice on your wounded hands does not feel good.
No acid reflux today, but if I burp I taste cayenne pepper. Strenuous activity will still be delayed until my body gets used to it.
If day 3, which is supposed to be a bad one like day 2, is like today, then it should be a cakewalk. I know that it sounds like I'm showboating with 8 days left, but I feel like a guy with a flaming anus deserves a little slack. The book says that "hot" bowel movements are the toxins being expelled. It sure would be more comfortable if they were cool like a peppermint. Unfortunately, I'll have to settle for flaming bile.
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 7 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 5 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 5
Number of random objects expelled during said bowel movements: 0, but still hoping
Pounds lost from previous day: 2.4
Today was a pretty easy day. The saltwater was not as bad this morning, as evidenced by cutting my consumption time down by more than half. That doesn't mean that it's good though. My quick consumption also led to some quick excretion. I was ready to go before I even finished my salt water. Tempting fate by trying to control your bowels whilst drinking saltwater is something that I should probably never try again. Helen cleans up enough crap at work, so I highly doubt she'd be up for me waking her up to clean up me and my explosion on the floor. Knowing my luck, Butters would be dumb enough to come roll in it.
I started drinking my lemonade 2 doses at a time. I assume that this is legit because it's more about how many ounces you drink per day and not the individual servings, if that makes sense. You're supposed to average about 1 ounce of lemonade per 2 pounds of body weight. It is recommended to space them out so that you don't get hungry throughout the day. The multiple dose game plan accomplishes two things. First, it allows me to not feel full of liquid all day long. I can knock out two doses and give my stomach and bladder time to pass it. And pass it they do. Second, I don't have to spend as much time juicing lemons. When you have cats that like to scratch and bite, lemon juice on your wounded hands does not feel good.
No acid reflux today, but if I burp I taste cayenne pepper. Strenuous activity will still be delayed until my body gets used to it.
If day 3, which is supposed to be a bad one like day 2, is like today, then it should be a cakewalk. I know that it sounds like I'm showboating with 8 days left, but I feel like a guy with a flaming anus deserves a little slack. The book says that "hot" bowel movements are the toxins being expelled. It sure would be more comfortable if they were cool like a peppermint. Unfortunately, I'll have to settle for flaming bile.
Day 1, 10/27/08
Glasses of "lemonade" consumed: 8
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 15 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 20 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 4
Pounds lost from previous day: 1.2
One day down, nine to go. The day started with the delightful quart of saltwater. I don't like drinking things when I wake up. I really don't like drinking water when I wake up. I emphatically don't like drinking a quart of saltwater when I wake up. I only gagged a few times and managed to finish the entire amount. 20 minutes later I was off to the bathroom.
I'm going to have to wake up a little earlier than usual so that the majority of my bathroom visits will be completed before the market opens up. The last thing I want to happen is to have to choose between watching my stock positions and going to the bathroom. The market is so crazy in the first few minutes that lots of money can be made or lost in a very short time. I would prefer to be at peace while sitting on the toilet, eliminating toxins and waste.
The "lemonade" mixture does not taste that great. The layer of flavors tastes like a poorly mixed michelada. First you taste the lemon, then the syrup, and finally the cayenne. Not too pleasant. The taste tended to linger in my mouth and throat all day.
I tried to go running, which I normally do a few times a week, to see if I had increased energy. About half a mile into the run I developed some sort of clog in the middle of my chest and lungs and decided to head home. A block from our house I had to stop running and start walking because I was experiencing the abundance of saliva that pours into your mouth right before you throw up. A bunch of coughs and a few dry heaves later I was okay. I'm guessing that I was experiencing acid reflux for the first time in my life. I don't know if I'll try to run again with all of this lemon juice and cayenne pepper in my system.
I never really experienced hunger because my stomach was filled with liquid all day. I've never consumed so much liquid in a day in my life. I had cravings for putting something in my mouth and chewing. Other times I felt like I should be eating because I hadn't eaten yet and I'm used to eating by that time. The master cleanse book says that cravings are for specific foods or tastes. Hunger is when you want to eat a bowl of plain lettuce. No hunger yet.
The main thing that I took away from day 1 is the realization of how much of our society and culture revolves around food and beverage. It seems like every other commercial on T.V. is for some type of food or drink. People also like to eat and drink while hanging out, myself included.
Days 2, 3, and 7 are rumored to be the worst days. As I compose this on day 2, so far so good, but that might change. I'll update day 2 this evening.
Length of time to drink quart of saltwater: 15 minutes
Length of time between completion of salt water consumption and 1st trip to the bathroom: 20 minutes
Number of bowel movements: 4
Pounds lost from previous day: 1.2
One day down, nine to go. The day started with the delightful quart of saltwater. I don't like drinking things when I wake up. I really don't like drinking water when I wake up. I emphatically don't like drinking a quart of saltwater when I wake up. I only gagged a few times and managed to finish the entire amount. 20 minutes later I was off to the bathroom.
I'm going to have to wake up a little earlier than usual so that the majority of my bathroom visits will be completed before the market opens up. The last thing I want to happen is to have to choose between watching my stock positions and going to the bathroom. The market is so crazy in the first few minutes that lots of money can be made or lost in a very short time. I would prefer to be at peace while sitting on the toilet, eliminating toxins and waste.
The "lemonade" mixture does not taste that great. The layer of flavors tastes like a poorly mixed michelada. First you taste the lemon, then the syrup, and finally the cayenne. Not too pleasant. The taste tended to linger in my mouth and throat all day.
I tried to go running, which I normally do a few times a week, to see if I had increased energy. About half a mile into the run I developed some sort of clog in the middle of my chest and lungs and decided to head home. A block from our house I had to stop running and start walking because I was experiencing the abundance of saliva that pours into your mouth right before you throw up. A bunch of coughs and a few dry heaves later I was okay. I'm guessing that I was experiencing acid reflux for the first time in my life. I don't know if I'll try to run again with all of this lemon juice and cayenne pepper in my system.
I never really experienced hunger because my stomach was filled with liquid all day. I've never consumed so much liquid in a day in my life. I had cravings for putting something in my mouth and chewing. Other times I felt like I should be eating because I hadn't eaten yet and I'm used to eating by that time. The master cleanse book says that cravings are for specific foods or tastes. Hunger is when you want to eat a bowl of plain lettuce. No hunger yet.
The main thing that I took away from day 1 is the realization of how much of our society and culture revolves around food and beverage. It seems like every other commercial on T.V. is for some type of food or drink. People also like to eat and drink while hanging out, myself included.
Days 2, 3, and 7 are rumored to be the worst days. As I compose this on day 2, so far so good, but that might change. I'll update day 2 this evening.
Overview
I have decided to take part in the Master Cleanse. It is a system designed to cleanse the body of toxins that build up in one's intestines, colon, kidney, liver, etc.... Other benefits include weight loss, increased energy, and a "heightened sense of self."
Here's the gist of it:
6- 12 times daily drink a concoction consisting of
8 oz. water
2 tbsp. fresh squeezed organic lemon juice
2 tbsp. grade b organic maple syrup
1/10 tsp. or more cayenne pepper
Before you go to bed drink a cup of senna tea, an herbal laxative
When you wake up in the morning drink 1 qt. (32 oz.) of water mixed with 2 tsp. of non-iodized sea salt
Drink lots of water
Have multiple bowel movements, as they rid your body of all of the toxins
Sounds like fun, huh? There is no consumption of food or any other liquids besides what is listed about. The cleanse is supposed to last for 10 days. The longest I've ever gone without eating has been 3 days. I think that 10 is more. Once the cleanse is over you must "ease" your way back in to food. The first few day or so after is reserved for fruit juices. If your stomach can handle juice, you can move on to vegetable broth. Once your stomach can handle the broth you may move on to small quantities of raw fruits and vegetables. All in all, I'm looking at about 14 days of not eating solid food.
I had never heard of the master cleanse until a few weeks ago when a friend mentioned it to me. As I prepared for the cleanse and mentioned it to others, I was amazed at how many people had heard of it. As I was going through the checkout line at the grocery store with my 40+ lemons, 9 bottles of maple syrup, cayenne pepper, salt, and senna tea the cashier said, "I know what you're doing. Good luck, you'll need it." Damn her and her condescending ways.
Despite its benefits, I'm not really doing the cleanse for any of them. Yeah, fewer toxins and pounds and more energy will be great, but the cleanse will be more of a personal challenge than anything else. I just want to see if I can do it. I wish I were dedicating it to something noble, like the honor of starving people worldwide, but that was not my original intent so I'm not going to say that's my reason. I'm also not looking to resolve emotional issues from my past like a lot of the nut jobs who say that the cleanse has helped them to accomplish. Hippies are crazy, no doubt.
I started the cleanse on Monday, October 27. This blog will serve as an outlet to record my thoughts, feelings, and other, more personal, information. It won't be pretty, but it will be honest. Enjoy.
Here's the gist of it:
6- 12 times daily drink a concoction consisting of
8 oz. water
2 tbsp. fresh squeezed organic lemon juice
2 tbsp. grade b organic maple syrup
1/10 tsp. or more cayenne pepper
Before you go to bed drink a cup of senna tea, an herbal laxative
When you wake up in the morning drink 1 qt. (32 oz.) of water mixed with 2 tsp. of non-iodized sea salt
Drink lots of water
Have multiple bowel movements, as they rid your body of all of the toxins
Sounds like fun, huh? There is no consumption of food or any other liquids besides what is listed about. The cleanse is supposed to last for 10 days. The longest I've ever gone without eating has been 3 days. I think that 10 is more. Once the cleanse is over you must "ease" your way back in to food. The first few day or so after is reserved for fruit juices. If your stomach can handle juice, you can move on to vegetable broth. Once your stomach can handle the broth you may move on to small quantities of raw fruits and vegetables. All in all, I'm looking at about 14 days of not eating solid food.
I had never heard of the master cleanse until a few weeks ago when a friend mentioned it to me. As I prepared for the cleanse and mentioned it to others, I was amazed at how many people had heard of it. As I was going through the checkout line at the grocery store with my 40+ lemons, 9 bottles of maple syrup, cayenne pepper, salt, and senna tea the cashier said, "I know what you're doing. Good luck, you'll need it." Damn her and her condescending ways.
Despite its benefits, I'm not really doing the cleanse for any of them. Yeah, fewer toxins and pounds and more energy will be great, but the cleanse will be more of a personal challenge than anything else. I just want to see if I can do it. I wish I were dedicating it to something noble, like the honor of starving people worldwide, but that was not my original intent so I'm not going to say that's my reason. I'm also not looking to resolve emotional issues from my past like a lot of the nut jobs who say that the cleanse has helped them to accomplish. Hippies are crazy, no doubt.
I started the cleanse on Monday, October 27. This blog will serve as an outlet to record my thoughts, feelings, and other, more personal, information. It won't be pretty, but it will be honest. Enjoy.
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